Roll On **(Updated for the un-ecosavy such as myself)**

After spending the past 48 hours with a handful of stomach-sick kids here on the ark, I have become intimately acquainted with our downstairs powder room. I know exactly what can and cannot be found in the small basket positioned on the toilet tank (hand cream, hair "pretties", one black pick, one hairbrush and the head of a Polly Pocket). I know exactly which corners and baseboards need a thorough cleaning (all of them). I also know that located on the small, metal trash can with lid was an extra roll of toilet paper. This is a must have for a main-floor powder room in a houseful of 8 people lest we find our guests having to, ahem, drip dry.

After tucking the five littlest ones in to bed last night, I meandered past said room and noticed that the toilet paper roll was empty. My eyes quickly darted to the spot where I had repeatedly seen the extra roll during the day. Lo and behold, it wasn't there. I couldn't believe it. I looked in the trash can, behind the toilet, in the basket, even in the toilet itself (yes, that's been known to happen here on occasion), but to no avail. I called out to the Boy, the only child still awake, "Do you know where the toilet paper is?" He glanced up at me, shook his head and went back to his "oldest kid" zone-out fest. I called up to the two older girls, who had just been tucked in for bed. Again, no clue. Honestly, I was starting to question my sanity. In a powder room no bigger than a coat closet, where I had logged an easy 6 hours over the past 2 days, I thought maybe I had missed it. So, I checked again. Nothing. Not even a spare square left as a sign that my mental health wasn't totally deteriorating. Finally, defeated, I headed up to our bathroom to grab a new roll PLUS an new spare. I stopped in the nursery on my way where Baby T and N were snuggled in the cozy, darkness of their cribs. That was when I heard it, a quiet voice said, "The paper towels are in the basement." I looked and found N, with her two big blue eyes peering out from under her blanket, and asked, "Did YOU put the toilet paper in the basement?" She answered without hesitation, "Yes." (This next question may seem unnecessary as the mystery was solved, but I couldn't help it, I had to ask.) "N, WHY did you put the toilet paper in the basement?" Again, quick to respond, she said, "Because I didn't want anyone to find it."

Of course, now why didn't I think of that?

**If you, too, live under a large-diesel fueled un-ecofriendly rock you can click here to get the inside poop (pun totally intended) on Julie's Sheryl Crow comment. ;-)**