Friday, August 01, 2008

It's Not Any Easier

Sometimes, people--even well-meaning ones--outside adoption circles joke that people who adopt "have it easy." No labor or stretch marks. No morning sickness or swollen ankles. Just a pile of paperwork and BAM! you have a child. People--highly educated people--who have adopted sometimes presume that becoming pregnant can be as easy as just thinking about it and BAM! another child.

Having been on both sides of welcoming a child into our home, let me say this: neither side has it any easier. It simply takes a ride on the roller-coaster of infertility or pulling up the old bootstraps and persevering in the face of the ever-changing bureaucracy which is the hallmark of adoption to know this. And for a parent who has lost a child, even one they have never held in their arms, the hurt and ache and emptiness is still the same.

In the midst of our celebrating, we continue to pray for those families (yes, there were a few) in our group whose cases did not pass court yesterday and for all families who long for the joy that a new child brings--regardless of their means of arrival.


Anne said...

Amen, sister! You summed it up very well. Parenthood is a calling and one that is totally intermingled with God. Sometimes that means a spiritual motherhood/fatherhood.

Being a biological parent has it own challenges. I tell people who are looking into adoption that it is NOT for the faint of heart. It is a journey that you go on, like none that you can imagine.

And in the end, no matter how that child came into your life, the joy is overwhelming.

Remember: "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me!"


Alice Gunther said...

Well spoken and very true.

Praying with you.

Suzanne said...

Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could all have compassion and joy for one another.